Goals

Jan. 2nd, 2016 12:28 pm
thenerdygirl: (Pirate)
[personal profile] thenerdygirl
Wow, it takes a lot of time to catch up if you've been off LJ for a week lol. I try to do a bit of catching up and commenting this morning but if I missed anyone or anything major, sorry!

Last night I started a new list on day zero project although I decided against the usual "101 things in 1001 days" lists that the site was pretty much created for. Instead I decided to do my own "50 things in 501 days", since I usually manage to get most of the 101 list I figured 50 should be fairly easy to finish. I've still got to add another few goals so the list isn't finished yet but I may post it here once I have the full list though no promises.

Lately I've been wondering if it's better to share goals or to keep them to yourself as I've read arguments for both ways. Some say sharing goals makes you more inclined to reach them, others say keeping it to yourself makes you more likely to reach them. I generally find it depends on the goals and who I tell. With LJ I usually find it helps as I've posted past 101 lists here and gotten most of them finished but I find telling people I know offline is usually less helpful...though I'm not entirely sure why that is.

What do you guys think? Do you find you do better when you talk about goals or better when you keep them to yourself? Or a mix of both?

Date: 2016-01-02 04:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] incandescent.livejournal.com

I heard about a study once where people who discussed their goals were less likely to achieve them. That was because by talking about them, they felt that they'd already achieved them in a way. Something to bear in mind. :)

Date: 2016-01-04 04:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
I remember reading something like that too, the writer was probably referencing the same study and it's one of the things that had me thinking about goals. I will :)

Date: 2016-01-02 05:02 pm (UTC)
commoncomitatus: (➸ i can't fail this city)
From: [personal profile] commoncomitatus
I think it depends on the goal, TBH. Some things are just abstract concepts as long as they're just in my head, but as soon as I say it out loud to someone else it becomes a case of "well, I have to do it NOW; someone else knows about it!" and feeling like someone's watching makes me less likely to get lazy about it. With other things, though, talking about it in public is just a fast-track to disappointment.

In either case, it always feels a whole lot worse if I end up failing when I've shared it with other people, like I'm not just letting myself down but them as well. So I guess it's a toss-up between the motivation of being accountable to someone else vs. the shame of disappointing more than just yourself if you fail.

Date: 2016-01-04 05:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
I agree, certain goals work better when shared and sometimes I find people who have the same goals which can also be motivating too. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the subject :)

Date: 2016-01-02 05:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] starcrossed.livejournal.com
Definitely talk about... Otherwise I wouldn't be motivated to do anything!

Date: 2016-01-04 05:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
That's a good point, something to consider. Thanks for sharing :)

Date: 2016-01-02 06:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twissie.livejournal.com
It's only very recently, like the last year or so, that I've actually set goals for myself. I'm not sure if sharing them has had any impact, but it would be interesting to try and see if it would make a difference. I find it really difficult to set and follow through on long term goals, so I mostly set short term ones. Things that can be achieved within a day, a week, or a month.

Date: 2016-01-04 05:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
I find shorter term goals are ones I'm more likely to reach. I think the hardest goals for me are the ones that have big numbers or require me to do it everyday. Like it would never been any good for me to set a goal like take a picture a day. Breaking them up into smaller sets helps.

Date: 2016-01-02 07:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lyssa027.livejournal.com
I don't think it matters either way for me. I tend to not achieve goals whether I keep them to myself or share them :x

Date: 2016-01-04 05:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
No shame in that :) I knew a few people who don't find setting goals to be helpful and tend to achieve more without a set list.

Date: 2016-01-02 07:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] millionbubbles.livejournal.com
I find I'm more inclined to do my goals if I mention them or talk about them. If they are only in my mind, I figure no one else will know if I do it or not. Yeah it's kinda said that I'm motivated by people seeing me doing it and not just for myself, but if I am being honest, that does kind of account for me completing goals.

Date: 2016-01-04 05:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
I don't think it's sad, I think it's only natural and hey, if it helps then that's all that matters.

Date: 2016-01-02 07:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sandysmemory.livejournal.com

It depends.  I always go on if it feels right to share.

Date: 2016-01-04 05:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
That's a good system :)

Date: 2016-01-02 11:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jeune-fleur.livejournal.com
I have read that posting your goals publicly and writing about them forces some sort of commitment. Well... to be honest I don't think that's entirely true. I have been posting my resolutions for years on LJ and I hardly ever accomplish anything, mostly because those resolutions never aligned with what I truly desired. I know which areas of my life need to change to get me closer to the future I want, but I still lack the commitment to make changes. So, as far as that doesn't change, weather I share my goals or not doesn't change a thing.

And, wow, it surprises me how honest I'm being with myself right now ^^; thank you for posting this. I needed it!

Date: 2016-01-04 06:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
You're welcome, I'm glad it helped :)

That is interesting though as I've read the opposite, that publicly sharing your goal can make you feel like you accomplished something so you get a sense of satisfaction which can hamper one's ability to continue with the goal. I'm with you though in not thinking it's entirely true either, it really just depends on the individual and the goals.

Date: 2016-01-03 12:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] viciousladybug.livejournal.com
I always share my goals list with my therapist. She keeps me on task and periodically asks me about them and whether I've acheived them.

Date: 2016-01-04 06:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
That's interesting and it sounds very helpful :)

Date: 2016-01-03 03:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twodottedlines.livejournal.com
Sometimes you just have to cut it off and say that you can't make it through all the entries. LJ gets especially busy over the holidays and year end when everyone is posting their updates/year end posts!

I enjoy sharing goals more than keeping them to myself - it gives me more motivation to keep at them!

Date: 2016-01-04 06:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
I think you're right. It's fun to read everyone's entries but it shouldn't eat too much time either. I guess worry because I don't want people on my friends list to feel like I'm not paying attention, especially when big stuff happens.

That's cool! I enjoying sharing them too, which I posted my past 101 lists and have a day zero account. I've just wondering if it's helpful or not. Thanks for sharing your thoughts :)

Date: 2016-01-04 08:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] an-su.livejournal.com
I kind of think it depends on the nature of the goal - it can be better one way or the other... I usually don't get a list of goals to myself, as I know life keeps getting in the way, so I'll take one at a time, when it feels like possible getting done...

Date: 2016-01-04 06:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thenerdygirl.livejournal.com
That's a good way to approach it too. I've certainly had life get in the way of past goals. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the subject :)

Date: 2016-01-11 07:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dreamwishdo.livejournal.com
I like to tell people my goals in hopes that someone may light a fire under my butt so that I can follow through with my goals, haha. But I get it, the argument can go both ways. I think a little mix of both can't hurt you :)

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